How to Build Your Self-Confidence

Throughout my younger years, I struggled with building my self-confidence. Looking back at my old photos, I can't help but wonder if I was always this unsure of myself or if it's something that developed over time.

As I've entered my 30s, I've realized just how important self-confidence is, and I've made it a priority to work on building it up. But let me tell you, it's not easy.

There's a common misconception that self-confidence = you're cocky or full of yourself, but that’s not the truth. Self-confidence is so important and building self-confidence means you become more motivated, happier, and less concerned with what others think of you. You become more authentic, and your relationships with others improve as a result. It's not about being perfect, but rather about accepting yourself and being comfortable in your own skin.

understand the root cause

The most important part to building your self-confidence is understanding why you have low self confidence. Do you ever feel like you lack confidence in yourself? Maybe you talk down to yourself or believe you'll never be good enough? Or maybe past experiences have shaped the way you view yourself, leaving you feeling defeated and unable to trust your abilities. Whatever the reason may be, it's so important to understand why you have low self-confidence before you can begin to build it up. So, what are the root causes of low self-confidence? Negative self-talk, past experiences, and comparisons with others are just a few examples. It's essential to identify your own sources of low self-confidence so you can start to work through them.

Journaling is a fantastic tool to help you with this step and this is the PERFECT chance to start journaling down your thoughts. Write down any thoughts or questions you have about why you lack confidence in yourself. Take your time to dig deep — even if it's scary — and uncover the true reasons behind your low self-confidence. Pour out ALL your feelings and thoughts onto the pages and watch as the answers reveal themselves. It may feel overwhelming at first, but keep writing until you've uncovered everything you need to know.

Remember, understanding the root causes of low self-confidence is a crucial step in building it up. Don't be afraid to explore your thoughts and emotions, even if it's uncomfortable! You really have to understand why and what are the reasons why you have low self confidence. Keep digging even if it’s scary. Keep understanding and keep trying to reveal the true reasons why you lost your self confidence. Once you dug it all out, you’re ready for the next step.

practice self-care

Self-care is SO important because once you put your mind, body, and health first, you see things in a different light such as reducing stress and anxiety, having boosted self-esteem, a clear mental health, and improvement on all relationships including yourself! So how do we improve our self-confidence?

MAKE SELF-CARE A PRIORITY ✔️

It's easy to put self-care on the back burner when life gets busy, but it's important to make yourself a priority. Remember that taking care of yourself allows you to show up as your best self in all areas of your life!

START SMALL 🤏🏼

You don't need to completely overwhelm yourself with a full routine overnight. Start small by incorporating one self-care activity into your day and gradually add more as you feel comfortable.

SCHEDULE IN ME TIME 🛀🏻

Just like scheduling in appointments and work commitments, you should try to schedule in time for self-care activities like exercising, meditation, or reading a book to make it a habit.

EXERCISE DAILY 🧘🏻‍♀️

It doesn't even have to be a strenuous workout, just try to move your body for at least 30 minutes a day. Personally, I love starting my day with yoga - it helps me feel centered and relaxed. I started small by doing a 5-minute morning yoga, then it gradually went to 10 minutes, then 15, 20, and now 30. Over time, I realized that even something small made my day so much better. I felt more confident over time and stopped slouching. Don’t forget! This wasn’t an overnight process. It took me a while to build this habit, but learned to never give up! Especially for yourself! You are your own biggest fan!

PRIORITIZE SLEEP 😴

Yes, we’ve all said to ourselves, we’ll sleep when we’re dead. But, our bodies need rest to recover, so make sure to get a healthy amount of sleep every night. Try to aim for 6 to 8 hours of sleep. Trust me, your body will thank you!

BE KIND TO YOURSELF 🩷

We all make mistakes and we all fall at some point in our life. But learning through these mistakes and failures is a great path for success. Once you see clarity, you come through and become better in life. Without mistakes, we don’t learn. Don’t forget to be kind to yourself. Everyone makes mistakes in life. Some people just don’t talk about it, but that doesn’t mean they never failed before. Understand that we’re all human. This is how we learn and grow 🌱

KEEP A GRATITUDE JOURNAL 📝

It's easy to focus on the negative things in our lives, but taking time to reflect on what we're grateful for can shift our perspective. Start small by writing down one thing you're grateful for every day, and see how it changes your outlook. For example for myself, I’m so grateful every day that I have a roof over my head. A nice bed to sleep on. Loving parents. Amazing friends. So, what are you grateful for?

DOWNLOAD THE I AM DAILY AFFIRMATIONS APP 💌

This app provides positive affirmations to help boost your mood and self-confidence. You can even add your own affirmations to personalize your experience. When I lost my self-confidence a while ago, my brother told me to download the I am app. Little did I know that even just reading these affirmations on a daily basis could slowly change my mood and how I thought of myself. So download this app, install it as a widget, and read the daily I am affirmations. (not sponsored, I just love it!)

let’s give it a shot!

Crush your goals one step at a time! Starting something new can be daunting, but don't let that discourage you from pursuing your dreams. The key to success is setting achievable goals that you can realistically conquer. Instead of diving headfirst into an overwhelming task, take it slow and steady. Like a butterfly, you have to be a caterpillar first, and the beautiful process of metamorphosis comes after!

Remember to pat yourself on the back for even the smallest accomplishments! It's easy to overlook the progress you've made when you're focused on the end goal. But celebrating each milestone along the way can give you the confidence boost you need to keep pushing forward. After all, you are your own biggest fan!

So, let's show some love to the one person who knows you best - YOU! Don't rely on others to give you praise or validation! Take ownership of your accomplishments and give yourself the credit you deserve. Your journey towards self-confidence starts with setting realistic goals and giving yourself the motivation to achieve them, one step at a time.

positive influences matter

Surrounding yourself with positive influences is the key to living a fulfilling life. Surrounding yourself with positive influences can make all the difference! Whether it's your friends, family, or mentors, having people who encourage and support you is key. Think about it, if you're always around someone who talks down about everyone or everything, do you really want to be in that position? Negativity is contagious, and it can bring you down. Instead, surround yourself with people who uplift you, who inspire you to be your best self.

Social media can also be a confidence killer. We see people living their luxurious lives, flaunting their perfect bodies, and it's easy to compare ourselves to them. But, let's be real, people put on a front on social media. We don't know what goes on behind the scenes. Don't waste your time comparing yourself to others, it's not worth it! I even had to deactivate my account a few times because I was guilty of doing the same thing. But, why should we care? We don't know them, and they don't know us. Focus on yourself, surround yourself with positive influences, and watch your confidence grow!

save this Pin for a gentle reminder that self care is important!

Remember to start small, set achievable goals, and surround yourself with positive influences. Life isn’t a race, we’re all on the same path called the game of life. Don't compare yourself to others, and don't forget to praise yourself for your achievements, no matter how small or big they are! 🥰

Now it's time to take action and start building your self-confidence today. Remember, life is not a race, and success comes to those who believe in themselves. Share your tips for improving self-confidence in the comments below along with your favorite emoji! Let's support each other on this journey to greater self-confidence and a more fulfilling life.

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Last Updated: 10.15.2024